Married and Flirting? Some Advice and Secrets to Hold Dear

Francis Githinji asked:


Flirting is natural and automatic for many sexual beings. Sometimes whether men and women are married or not they still flirt with other people. Being married and flirting is on the rise and many people have no apologies to make whatsoever. Some married people do it with no bad intentions. They do not count flirting as cheating on their spouses. Some of the most valued flirting advice is that the flirting words should be with a light touch just incase they fall in to deaf ears. If the targeted person receives the word with contempt, you can always save your face from shame. One of the flirting secrets is that people who explain their words or apologize after flirting produce less successful flirting results.

What are the implications of married and flirting men or women? Some people view this behavior as harmless. After all, is it a crime to find a girl beautiful and tell her so? Or is it wrong for a woman to dress attractively and use her God given feminine wiles? So is it a big deal if the person happens to be married? The flirting secrets reveal that, people who are married and flirting actually have stronger marriages. A good flirting advice is, flirt while you can. Do not be limited by your being married. A man is flirtatious towards a woman to make her notice him, to attract her and may be to ask her out for a date. My flirting advice for ladies is that, flirt to attract his attention and enjoy a good time but not for long term relationship.

My flirting advice is, do not be affected by your flirting spouse. Look at the positive side of the behavior. For instance, if a guy happens to flirt with your endeared wife and she flirts back, you should be proud that your wife is attractive enough to attract another guy. This will make you realize that you had better pull up your socks. If you are married and flirting you most definitely know your worth. This helps you not to let people take you for granted. Among the flirting secrets is that, the people who flirt most are the best lovers to their partners. This is because in their process of flirting they learn a lot about appreciation and they observe first hand reaction of flirting. A man who is flirtatious will always admire and appreciate his wife because he knows that if he fails some else will.

There are some situations where people who are married and flirting forgiven. This is a category of people who are born to flirt. Flirting does not stop even after marriage and flirting is considered to be their second nature. Whatever they say is laughed off and is actually taken with a pinch of salt. Flirting advice is, do not hide it from your spouse if you do not mean any harm. If your husband flirts with a close friend or a relative in your full view, you will not have much problem since you will understand it is in jest. When people flirt when they are in an extravagant mood after taking a drink it is perfectly acceptable. One of the best flirting secrets is that, the best time you are allowed to flirt is when you are drunk. Take advantage of the drink and flirt exhaustively.



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Flirting When Married Rules

Francis Githinji asked:


Everybody flirts, yes even the married ones. Just because you got married it doesn’t mean you should lock the keys of the flirting and throw them in a deep well never to be found again. In fact this is when flirting becomes even more interesting. Get out of the house, flirt at every chance you get. For those people who look for adventure this should be the greatest adventure ever. The only rule about flirting when you are married is not to be caught doing it especially if your partner did not know you were doing it. You do not want a divorce file sent to you because your husband or wife caught you flirting and they got so hurt they could barely look at you again. Flirting when married is also a nice way of knowing if you are still desirable to other people and not only your husband or wife alone.

Just like flirting that is carried out by people who are not attached to anyone, flirting when married entail almost the same things. The only difference is that you have to be careful not to fall in love with this person. This is because for single people, they mostly flirt for fun and at the same time to try and find themselves potential candidate they could settle down with in future. When you are married be careful not to lead the person on in such a way to make him or her think you are available for something more than flirting later yet you are not. There is a certain level you should not pass when you are married and it comes to flirting.

If you are flirting when married make sure you can stop just in time if you see the need to stop and it is threatening your relationship with your husband or wife. If you find that you cannot stop flirting with a person you had better seek help. That is because you will be in much trouble if you can not stop and your partner finds out that you have such a problem. Though people who flirt love their partners, the partners might not think that they love them enough and perhaps the reason for their flirting. So be careful while flirting and do not do it when your husband or wife is fully watching you and you know they do not like it. It is not good at all.

Finally if you are flirting when married respect the other person enough not to do things they do not approve. Flirting can be a very good thing but it can also be a very bad thing. This is because when married people flirt they bring back a lot of good things in their relationship. As long as the two people who are married are flirting and all of them accept that their partner is only doing it for fun and not to hurt them, it is a safe thing to do. You might even come to appreciate and love each other more. Make sure before you start flirting with any one that your partner is fine with it and that you are not jeopardizing your relationship with him or her. Go ahead, have fun flirting while married. It certainly is not cheating.



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Five Ways to Sneak Off & Celebrate Valentines Day

Shayla Moore asked:


Having kids does not have to put a damper on your romantic Valentines Day celebration. Couples with kids occasionally leave the Valentines Day celebration to take place behind closed bedroom doors once the kids have gone to bed. Of course, there are other options that are not quite as restrictive on your romantic evening. Consider the following options to heighten your celebration and allow you to sneak away from the kids, if only for a little bit.

Throw a Valentines Day Party for the Kids

Get together with another couple you know that has kids and create an evening of Valentines fun for the kids. You can have them invite a few friends and plan a dinner (pizza and snacks) and some entertainment. You might allow them to have party games or watch a movie marathon of their choosing. What they do does not particularly matter.

While one couple is watching the kids, the other couple can sneak away for some much needed Valentines Day TLC. When the couple returns they can watch the kids and the other couple is off to have some fun. This ensures both you and your friends have a good time, and the kids do, too!

Celebrate in the Afternoon

If your children go to school or daycare during the day, the perfect solution is going to be for you to celebrate during the day. This gives you around eight hours of uninterrupted time with your lover. You will be free to roam the city or your house with your lover without your children.

Whether you choose to enjoy a quiet moment alone with your lover or you want to have some passionate lovemaking time, you will have plenty of time to do whatever pleases you both. Best of all, you will not have to worry about hurrying through the process, like you might if they were with friends or somewhere where the kids or other family members might come home too soon.

Send them to the Movies & the Arcade

If you have an older child or a willing babysitter, consider sending your kids out for a night on the town. Dinner, a movie, and some arcade fun can easily clear four to five hours in an evening. A lot of pleasurable activities can occur in that amount of time. This would give you some time to enjoy your lover in all those important ways you took for granted before you had kids and it won’t be that expensive to do either.

Make Use of Grandma/Aunt (Family)

If the kids have a grandma, aunt, or another family member who is constantly trying to spend more time with them and they do not have any plans, consider letting the kids stay the night with them on Valentines. Not only will this thrill your family member who gets to spend time with the kids, but it will also allow you to have a full night to yourselves.

You can create a sensual love den and do all of the things that you rarely get a chance to do. You can walk around naked or make love in any room of the house. By the end of the evening you will surely be elated and feeling better than you have in months!

Sneak off for Bath-time Fun

If the kids are home and they are there to stay there is still hope. Get them involved in an activity and then sneak off for some bath-time fun. One parent can head off and get the bath ready while the other parent handles the kids. Once the kids are immersed in their activities the bath should be ready to go.

Together, in the tub you can enjoy a sensual soak, some intimate conversation, and perhaps even some intimate lovemaking in the confines of your secret love nest. While this is not the most romantic option, if you miss time with your lover this is a good way to get it. Of course, you can always wait until the kids go to sleep.



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Getting Over a Divorce - Online Dating Advice for Divorced Singles

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Mr Online Dating asked:


Dr’s and psychologists have researched grief and its cycle over time in relation to death and loss.  A divorce, especially if you have been married for a long time is no different in that you need time to grieve your loss.  In addition, Divorce often brings with it a sense of failure and conflicting emotions of love and perhaps hate.  There are five stages to the recovery process:  denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance.

During the denial phase, people often convince themselves that it is not really over, that miraculously everything will work out.  Another form of denial is denying that you feel any grief.  If early on in the divorce, you find yourself saying to people that you are over it then you may be setting yourself up for depression.

Next comes the anger - there may be other factors helping to fuel this.  Infidelity, abandonment, being left with the responsibilty of perhaps the home, the children or feeling like you have been cut out of your families lives all help fuel anger.

When the anger starts to fade, often people find themselves bargaining with their ex, as if by settling something the pain will go away.

Depression, more than often still tinged with anger is a feeling of deep sadness. At this stage the severly affected often seek help before settling into the acceptance stage.  At this time, it is time to pick up the pieces and rebuild your new life.

There are often times when the cycles intermingle and overlap or even seem absent.  It is unusual though for any one phase to be missed completely.  There are some things though that can help on that road to recovery and help you to get back “on the scene”.

Take Control

The first thing to do is try to take control of your life, of your finances and to see yourself as an independent being.  There is little point in moping around feeling sorry for yourself or going out and drinking every night.  It is time to stand up and start living the life you want to continue living.

Do things to make you happy - instead of feeling sorry for yourself and coming home every night to a microwave dinner.  Start to do things to make yourself happy.  Go for walks, buy yourself treats, start online dating and chatting to other people who are single, just like you.  Groups online often can help you to meet other singles with similar interests without it becoming so much like a “date”.

Learn who you are and to be yourself - Often during a marriage, you mould yourself and your partner into someone who makes the other happy or at least that they can live with.  Its time to let this go and start to think about what you like, what are your preferences and what you like to do.  You may be surprised with the person you find inside yourself!  Then you can go out or get online and meet others with the same take on life as you - before you know it you will be happier than you were before.  All it takes is for you to make it happen.

Let the past go - Dont dwell on the past, what went wrong and what went right.  That is what it is - the past.  Try to look back on the good times with fondness and forget the bad ever happened.  You may think that is impossible but with effort you will find that it isnt and you can start enjoying your life.

Be an initiator - don’t wait for others to invite you along for the ride - dive in and make things happen.  join social groups, setup your own online groups and invite people to join in the fun.

Dont become a stalker - many people feel that when they get divorced, they still have the right to contact their partner every day and to know what and when they are doing things.  This is not acceptable.  What your ex does and who they see is no longer your concern.  Accept it and move on. If you continue to contact your partner and to try to discuss what has happened continually, even if they ask you not to then you are stalking them.  This is not allowed by law and is not a good place for you to be at emotionally.  Try to meet new friends, online dating allows you to contact like minded folk day or night and so may be the answer for those sleepless nights.

Dont talk about it too much - When you start meeting friends online, you may go through a phase of talking about your ex, your divorce and your feelings.  This is fine and online dating and chat rooms allow you to do this - this could be better than paying a therapist!  Long term though your aim has to be to move forward.  When this time comes then try to avoid talking about your past and talk just about the now.  Noone wants to listen to someone going on and on about a significant other.

Let yourself grieve - there is a time for the grieving and it is important that you allow this healing process to take place.  Just don’t let it take over.

Trust and don’t let your new friends pay for the sins of your ex - Now you are back in the land of the living and hopefully online dating lots of local singles, remember not to let this past divorce spoil things for you in your future.  For instance if your ex cheated, there is nothing to say that your new friends will do similarly.  Trust, be open and honest and things can only get better!

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